Day 1.
Was awful.
And I'm not even cleansing yet.
I'm already smelling things I can't have, diverting my eyes, craving things. Feeling the NO instead of the I don't want.
There's zero way this is anything but mental at this point. But oh you devilish mind you.
Worst part of the day- my headache that wouldn't go away. And I was irritated...to put it mildly. I can't look at you, at the light, hear your voice, hear that noise, I hate it all.
And I'm so damn tired. Horribly tired. Can't think of words tired.
I got like 4 hours of sleep last night and lesson learned. NEED MORE SLEEP WHEN NOT PUMPING YOUR SYSTEM WITH COMFORT.
And honestly internet friends who aren't reading this, what this boils down to is:
The hatred, the headache, the general ill will towards life is because....
Day 1 zero coffee.
Fuck.
You.
If coffee is wrong I don't want to be right.
So to try to compensate and make myself feel better I spent my meals eating "allowed carbs" and I don't give a SHIT.
See you tomorrow in hell, bitches
Meals:
Breakfast: Apple pie quinoa
Lemon zinger tea
Lunch: Lentil stew/ Apple/ Almonds
Dinner: Chicken with lemon, olive oil, olives, zucchini /Brown rice
General thoughts: I'm realizing that I might feel really weak often and not adding supplements to my diet (aka trying to save $500) is probably a bad idea. I'm going to try to ask a clean online adviser for advice.
Intensions tomorrow:
More water. Go outside twice during the day. Breathe. Take measurements
